How'd my babies grow up so fast?

Schools pics, Fall 2009

Yes, it is the long lost blogger.... truth be told, I'm not a blogger but only an occasional poster. C'est la vie! I was just looking back over my old posts- and thus the pictures.... my babies are SO grown up. I mean, I knew that, but.... REALLY! Who are these children....er.... ahem.... young adults?

Josiah, Spring 2011

Oh! And by the way, I'm no longer the mother of twins. No, no, no, don't panic, both are still alive and well. They have claimed from Day One that they were not twins, but didn't know what, if any, the age difference was between them. It ranged from 5 days to 2 years. Ha!

But by the second annual visit to the pediatrician, doctors expressed a concern that Josiah was developing too quickly (for his "age"), to which I replied, "Well, I don't actually know his age." We were sent to an endocrinologist for bone age scans, which I requested for Naomi as well so we could compare, and indeed there was about a two year difference. So, maybe you're not twins. Well my paperwork says you are, so I guess you are now. That worked fine and dandy for another year or so.

Gotcha Day, March 2011

As the kids grew older, it became more and more obvious that Josiah was physically and socially more developed than his age. I deliberated a long time and carefully weighed all the factors before deciding to go ahead and change his age.

Naomi, Spring 2011

One factor his grade in school. Since the kids came to America at age eight and did not speak English, they were placed in 2nd instead of 3rd grade, so are a year behind. I didn't want Josiah to be two years behind and be teased and tormented. So I would have to move him ahead a grade. Neither were quite up to grade level in reading and writing, but my logic was that if had known his true age he would be in the higher grade anyway and still lagging by the same margin (you can only learn so fast). I spoke with the schools and they agreed. Next I approached the topic with Josiah. He would have to agree to tutoring all summer to make up as much of the missed grade as possible. He agreed.

The last birthday as twins, June 2011

Then, I began making my case for the court. I had medical evidence. I had the kids' first person account. But I really wanted something from relatives in Ethiopia.... and I had a phone number. I passed the number on to my sweet friend, Essete, whom we had met in Ethiopia and remained friends with, and asked if she could contact them and ask for something in writing regarding the kids ages. I had her assure them they would not be in trouble for hiding the truth... they had been afraid the children may be separated if they were not twins. Accurate birth records are not common and I was delighted when we not only found how how far apart they are - no, they are not twins - but the actual birth dates!

Josiah is exactly 301 days, about 13 months, older than Naomi. But their legal birth date was not right for either one of them. Josiah was born in November 1997, nineteen months prior to his legal birthday and Naomi was born in December 1998, six months from her legal birthday. So now I needed to decide how to approach this change. First, I decided not to go through the legal process and cost to change Naomi's for just a six month difference. Second, I also really wanted their birthdays to have an accurate biological time span between them. Third, and one of the most important reasons for my final decision is back to the school issue. Moving ahead a year in age and a year in school still left Josiah a year behind. I did not want him to have a November birthday and thus be two years behind for so much of the year. So we chose a date exactly 301 days earlier than the initial legal American birthday, making his birthday May 1998, replacing the former June 1999 (which is still Naomi's legal birth date).

Josiah, Fall 2011

Naomi, Fall 2011

Are you lost yet? I get it. The kids get it. Everyone else is lost. But the kids really like having two birthdays a year. No, not twice as many gifts! They can recognize and celebrate both, but only gifts and a party at one.

This year they both chose their Ethiopia birthday!

Happy 14th birthday, Josiah!

Happy 13th birthday, Naomi!